Going Home To Die

This is a strange time.  Things are looking up.  I’m managing to keep a part time job with people I really like.  They seem to have compassion, and understanding.  I think that’s what a lot of people in the world need.  Some people need to be shown a different way. I want to do better. …


They Took Back My Gibson Hummingbird

In 2021 a friend of mine, PL, who was pretty much family, told me that she had some people who wanted to meet me and could help me with my musical career.  I was dubious.  I’ve heard this all before.  This was different though.  This was coming from PL.  PL and I were tight.  We…


Hell, Michigan

You can have it all. There must be something you have that you can use as currency. Currency has many forms. It’s not always the almighty dollar. I’ve heard tell of the most broken people being the most beautiful. There is something in them that reverberates reality and somehow makes flowers bloom. I don’t think…


Running From Echoes

I’m not ashamed but I warned you please don’t ask me to forget you, my love This is not a superficial game Displaced again.  Another burnt bridge.  On another sinking ship. I woke up today in absolute terror.  Everyone hated me.  No one wanted me around.  I’ve been unassumingly laying the groundwork for this my…


I Believe

I spent the first 13 years of my life in an extremely abusive household.  Abuse has many forms.  But for me it was gaslighting, narcissism and physical.  My mom left the house in my thirteenth year.  She told my step-dad she wasn’t coming back until I was gone.  When this happened I was serving the…


Doug Hell Comes Face To Face With Canadian Military

2018 was a dangercunt. I was fresh out of a relationship of five years in which I had become a legendary enabler.  I had ballooned up to 297 pounds from sitting at my computer, stuffing my face, doing battle with pretty much everyone who might have an opinion that differed from mine.  As an unapologetic…


IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT


Lars Ulrich DOES NOT Suck

That’s right. You pea-brain metal heads need to get that through your thick skulls. Let me preface this rant by saying I’m not the authority on what’s good, or bad.  At best I’m an uninformed citizen, and a torrid fan of music.  I love it all.  I like to think there is something good in…


A Day In The Life

Sorry for the lack of updates, all 4 of you. So I’m 50 now.  My musical career is dead in the water.  I’m still officially a member of Green Jelly but that… doesn.t… mean… anything.  Everyone is a fucking member of Green Jelly.  I know GJ like to clown about how untalented they are, but…


My Guitar Your Guitar

my guitar must have a lucid reason for attempting life what is life? my guitar cautions me that it’s this extremely vulnerable happenstance existing like disease in an already sick reality my guitar tells me to stare out my window trying to will the ugliness into something beautiful and worth living for my guitar reminds…